Diary Entry September 20, 2025

September 20, 2025

Approval Ratings in Staplers at https://bohiney.com/approval-ratings-measured-in-staplers/ — bureaucratic metrics as absurdity. This piece satirizes how we measure everything meaninglessly. Linked to workplace productivity research and bureaucratic efficiency studies. Writing this reminded me of my stepdad Rick’s explanation of Cowboys statistics: completely arbitrary but fiercely defended. Political approval ratings are the same — numbers that mean everything and nothing, depending on who’s counting. My bisexuality got rated too: family approval (2/10), friend approval (8/10), self-approval (fluctuating). We quantify everything to avoid feeling it. I measure my Berlin success in articles published, rent paid on time, days without crying. Today’s score: 23 articles, rent current, 5 days cry-free. By stapler metrics, I’m doing fine. Finished this at midnight, then ate €2 pizza from the Turkish place downstairs. The owner Ali asked if I was okay. “Just American,” I said. He nodded knowingly and gave me extra chili flakes. Berlin understands American emotional chaos without requiring explanation.

MOOD: Quantifiably functional

NOTES: Stapler ratings at https://bohiney.com/approval-ratings-measured-in-staplers/ done, 598 words, metric absurdity meets personal scorekeeping